Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

 

This weeks Motivating Mindset will help you harness the power of your mind.

 

THE CHALLENGE

 

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:

"What is the value of the questions that I ask myself?"

 

THE PROMISE

 

Ask yourself this question to boost your brainpower and to become better at solving your own problems.

 

 

THE TIPS

Whether you like it or not, you are destined to encounter problems during your lifetime, it is simply part of the experience of being human.

But for human beings, it is not the problem that is important, but how we go about solving the problem that matters most.

Whether you realized it or not, you are constantly thinking to yourself and solving problems in the form of self-talk.

Think about when you ran into that old friend from high school and you were struggling to remember their name.

When you ask your subconscious to get it for you, it will usually come back with the right answer, although maybe not at the time you are face-to-face.

When you ask your subconscious a question, it has no choice but to return an answer to you. You can use this fact to your advantage. Here's how.

First, make sure that your internal-dialogue is positioned to help solve problems. Monitor the discussion, will this conversation move you closer to what you want?

If not, then the quality of the questions you are asking yourself may be the first place you want to change.

What if you could change your life just by changing the questions that you ask yourself? Yes you can, you were meant to, and you can start training yourself to ask better questions.

The moment you wake up tomorrow morning, and before you begin thinking about your day, ask yourself:

"What is the value of the questions that I ask myself?"

This question will give you an idea of whether major changes are needed, or perhaps just a tweak here or there will do the trick.

 

"Quality questions create a quality life. Successful people ask better questions, and as a result, they get better answers." --- Anthony Robbins

Half of your problem-solving power should always be devoted to clearly and accurately defining the problem. An accurate diagnosis is half the cure.

When you know exactly what the problem is, you are already that much closer to implementing a feasible solution.

 

Without knowing the exact nature of the problem, you will not very well-equipped to solve it, no matter what the situation. 

For instance, if you were unsure why a friend was upset with you, and never took the time to understand why, then how easily could you solve the problem?

 

Probably not very well. Luckily the ego will usually rectify this problem, so you don't have to worry about it, through its usual avenues such as justification, blame, denial, anger, etc... 

Some people would write-off the friends behavior as too weird or rude to be bothered with, some people even perhaps would ignore their friend until they "disclosed" the problem.

 

The problem with going this route is that by the time you two actually sit down and talk, there will be an emotional dam between you both that feels like it is about to burst.

Then, the best question from this lowered mind-frame and highly emotional vibrational state, would likely be: "What is your problem anyway!?" 

However, this question often doesn't solve the problem, in fact, it usually makes the situation much worst.

 

The real issue of why your friend is upset needs to be answered from a different level of thinking then what created the problem.

 

The real question is not what their problem is but, rather "How can you solve it?".

Which approach do you personally think would be more effective for you, or if it was used on you? Of course, knowing the problem is half the battle.

Therefore, you can immediately increase your personal effectiveness through the use of critical thinking questions. 

A good question will clearly define the problem, uncover any false assumptions, and help your mind focus on a solution.

When it comes to problem-solving, it is not the problem itself, but your perception of the problem that will make the most impact towards a solution.

 

For example, asking quality questions such as "What do I already know about this person/topic?", or "How have I solved problems like this before?" will help you tap into your existing experiences in order to better brainstorm solutions.

 

You must always focus on how you can be more personally effective, the moment you let up your lower-priority activities will start to consume all of your time, keeping you busy and burned out.

 

The key to personal effectiveness is the quality of questions that you ask yourself. You can take stock on the quality of your current level of questions by asking yourself:

"What is the value of the questions that I ask myself?" 

 

THE SECRET 

The power and affect that quality questions can have on your life is unquestionable. 

First, by thinking about quality questions you become more aware of the (normally unnoticed) conversations that you have with yourself.

 

This awareness will help you observe whether your self-talk is effective towards your goals or not. Are you treating yourself as an unconditional nurturing coach, or a conditional constant critic?

This will help you start to develop a less-biased opinion about whether your actions and self-talk are reinforcing your success, or in fact negating it.

Quality questions will also help you improve the quality of your inner self-talk, the conversations and commentary you have inside your head.  

  

When you master the anatomy of a quality question you become free to explore the future freely, and also where your past choices have taken you. 

When you are free to explore your self and experiences, you will now start to develop your natural navigation system, use this to hone in on your dreams.

  

The more valuable questions you ask, the more each quality answer will bring out the capable and confident person inside of you.

The goal of any quality question is to build a framework for success inside your brain, a process to use yesterday's and today's experiences in a positive way tomorrow.

With quality questions you can find a way to win, or at least walk away with one lesson to apply in the future, regardless of whether the experience was good, bad, or ugly.

Asking yourself quality questions is about finding better questions to bring about a better experience for all those involved.

Here is an off-the-cuff example. Imagine for a moment that you have this annoying habit that you want to break, i.e. you tend to talk too much when you are nervous.

You've determined that this isn't working for you and you want to change it, the first question you might ask yourself is: "Why do I over-talk when I am nervous?"

Again, all you need to do is ask your subconscious a good quality question, and then patiently sit back and allow for an answer.

 

Perhaps you will discover that you tend to talk more when you are nervous, because you feel uncomfortable with silence.

What happens when you are not sure what to do with an answer you receive? In this case, all you have to do is ask your subconscious another question.

Continuing with the example, you know that it's feeling uncomfortable with silence that is the problem, now you can ask your subconscious why.

The question you might want to ask now is, "Why am I uncomfortable with silence?" and then allow you sub-conscious to answer.

Maybe the 'reason' that returns to you is that you are uncomfortable with silence because you have low self-esteem.

What could you do at this point? Well you could continue to ask another question, i.e. "why you have self-esteem", and continue to go down the path of your problems.

However, consider now how much more empowering it would be to transport yourself into the realm of solutions?

How about instead of asking "why do I have this problem", you shift your questioning to "what can I do about it"?

In our over-talking example, how about switching from why you are uncomfortable with silence, to "what can I do to not be so uncomfortable with silence?"

Or, instead you could ask yourself, "In what ways can I communicate more confidently and concisely?"

Now you have shifted the emphasis off of diagnosing the problem, and switched on to finding a solution for the cure.

This works better because now you don't even need to solve your low-self esteem, because if when you find a way to be a more powerful and confident speaker, your self-esteem will have to match right?

Can you see how this little shift in thinking can make a huge difference. If not, go back and read it again until you get it!

By asking your subconscious questions you can begin to tap into your true power.

Stuck in a situation right now and still not sure where to start?

How about asking yourself a quality question such as: "What does success look like for me?", or "How can I turn my current situation around to best suit me?", or "What question have I not asked myself, but if I did, would lead to the greatest increase in the quality of my life?"

The better questions you ask yourself, the better answers you get, the better results occur, and better quality of life you will live.

Ultimately, quality questions add balance to your way of thinking, nurture your way of doing, and help to discover the consciousness behind being.

You can get a start to discover the power of your questions by asking yourself: "What is the value of the questions that I ask myself?"

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will help you get to the bottom of any unwanted behavior.


THE CHALLENGE

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:
"Why do I do what I do?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question whenever you wonder what is at the root of your behavior.


THE TIPS

No matter who you are, or where you live, there is only one measure of success; to be able to live your life in your own unique way.

We all have different ideas of what life as our "ideal" self looks like, but, how many people live up to their own personal standards?

Certainly by the evidence one can see that it's not the majority of people in this world.

Yet, we can all safely contend that no one "intentionally" wants to end up unhappy and not their ideal self, so what happens along the way?

We all have a built-in "ideal-self" meter, which means we know deep down inside if our actions align with our highest vision, or at least we know when our current lifestyle choices do not fulfill our deepest desires.

Research tells us that as many as 7 out of 10 people are working in their jobs "just to pay the bills" or "out of necessity".

If we could fast forward our lives to where we are unhappy, miserable, mid-life crisis, we would learn that sacrificing our self for money is a complete sell-out.

Yet how many of us are doing these right as we speak, saving the excuse their diversion from purpose is a learning experience.

Why not challenge yourself to start this learning experience earlier? How about striving to experience learning who you truly are?

Besides, is it not more a necessity to be who you are and to find a way to prosper from just being?

How would you like to pay the bills by being yourself?

How would you like to do what you loved and get paid for it?

Well yes you can, in fact it's not only your birth right, you can start moving towards it right at this moment.

It's called being in unison, and it means you are living your life authentically, answering your calling, discovering your true purpose.

It's exactly why people like Tiger Woods, Oprah Winfrey, Rachel Ray, and Jimmie Johnson don't work to get paid.

These people wouldn't consider doing what they love as work, they would do it regardless of whether they get paid. This is important.

All these people do is express themselves, live their passion, and they are remunerated and rewarded accordingly. Handsomely, we may as well adds well.

So what is the secret, why is the case of people living in their unison the more exception rather than the rule?

Ask yourself "What really prevents me from living my life authentically?"

Identify and commit to what you will have to do differently to make any changes happen.

Remember, nothing in your life will change until your behavior does.

Therefore, in order to change behavior you need to know why you behave that particular way to begin with.

We are all like computers and our behavior are like software programs.

At any time you can install and update old software versions with new more relevant replacement beliefs.

A good question to start probing into your behavior is to ask yourself: "Why do I do what I do?"

Give yourself permission to explore, and don't be afraid to discover the underlying causes of undesirable behavior.

Be patient with yourself and dig deep until you've found the root.

When it comes to living authentically, and fulfilling your deepest desires, it is never to late to start and always too soon to quit.

The only thing worse than a quitter is a person who is too afraid to begin.

Start today and begin by asking yourself the question: "why do I do what I do?"


THE SECRET

The billion dollar question is why do you behave in the way that you do?

If you don't know exactly why, then how do you ever expect to change, or correct your behavior?

Isn't that like playing a game that you have no idea about the rules?

Try playing chess, tennis, hockey, baseball or any game for that matter completely ignorant of the factors that you can control.

Chances are you would spend all your energy, attention and focus in areas that would bring you little reward or gain.

You would be making errors and mistakes left right and center, and the worst part is you wouldn't even know why.

Now you can see why so many of us are walking around frustrated about effecting positive changes to our behavior. We don't know the rules of the game!

In order to effect positive change to anything in your life you first need to know how to control human behavior.

So what do you really think determines human behavior?

Is it our circumstances? No, we are all dealt with a different hand, it's not the cards but how we play them that counts.

Is it our skill? No, because experience shows that success is due less to ability than it is to attitude.

Is it our parents? No, because our behavior can go either way, we can be alot like them, or a lot not like them.

Is it our personality? No, our personalities reflect our behavior as opposed to changing it.

Is it our habits? No, even the worst habit can be replaced with a more empowering one.

What determines human behavior then?

Ok... if you're stumped let's approach the situation from another angle by asking some other questions:

"If you knew a quicker, safer, hassle-free way to improve your life would you go that route?"

Yes, of course. So your driving behavior is only limited to the navigation system of the driver.

How about "if you knew how to lose weight effectively would you take it and apply it"

Chances are yes, and you would use this knowledge to alter your eating behavior.

What if "you could find out the money blocks that are holding you back from abundant prosperity, would you want to know?"

Again, the answer is absolutely yes! You would immediately apply these lessons to make more money flow into your life.

Would you then also agree that the only reason that you are earning your current level of income is because you don't know how to make more?

Obviously, because why would anyone still choose to make anything less?

No one would. Just like if you knew how to make a billion you wouldn't settle for earning a million. At least Donald Trump and Warren Buffet wouldn't.

So what is the main ingredient that is in all of these above scenarios?

The answer is knowledge. Knowledge is power. Knowledge is the application of information.

Wisdom is the experience of that knowledge.

Therefore, it all begins with an idea, or new information being inputed into the brain.

"Man's mind, once stretched by a new idea, never regains its original dimensions" - Oliver Wendell Holmes Jr.

With better information we make better choices right?

Better choices lead to better beliefs, better decisions, and stronger action.

Our actions repeated over a period of time is what we call behavior.

Information is what allows us to change our behavior and replace our habits.

Awareness is the first and most important step of changing any behavior. You cannot change what you are not aware of correct?

Once we become aware of something that we want to change, we can use that information to make adjustments.

What do we use to make adjustments? More information of course.

Everyday you are either moving towards or away a more authentic life for yourself.

How you recognize, accept and change the information will determine your degree of success in life.

An amazing way to ask for more information to come into your life is through quality questions.

The question to ask yourself to begin with is "Why do I do what I do?"

Write your answers down, discover your triggers, your interests, your conscious contradictions.

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

 

This weeks Motivating Mindset will help you see things more clearly and live with more clarity.

 

THE CHALLENGE

 

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:

"What else could this mean?"

 

THE PROMISE

 

Ask yourself this question in every instance you are searching for meaning and you will gain new perspectives.

  

 

THE TIPS

Have you ever got confused, angry, sad, hurt, frustrated, nervous, stressed, anxious, or upset?

If you are human then you have definitely have experienced at least one or two of these negative emotions.

Chances are, you may even be experiencing them on a daily basis.

If you want to reduce the amount of those feelings in your life a great question to ask yourself is: "What else could this mean?"

Human beings see the world first through our brains and then use our eyes to generate a matching perspective.

We see whatever we believe, i.e. seeing is believing... We also ignore what we don't want to believe... i.e. ignorance is bliss.

In general people underestimate their natural abilities and overestimate their weaknesses.

This means that your situation is probably not as bleak as you imagine, and you're more strong and talented than you give yourself credit. 

Yet we tend to think that everybody thinks, feels and acts the same way, or at least they should in most cases.

You think this way if you have ever got upset at someone with a different approach to doing things than you.

If you traveled with 12 of your closest friends on a trip for a month you would quickly spot exactly just how different you are.

But if during that trip you were faced with a problem that took all of you to solve, you may walk away more appreciative of our differences.

Our perspectives are by design as unique as our fingerprints, with no two being the exact same.

There is a beautiful and divine purpose as to why we all think, feel and act differently.

The truth is that it takes all sorts to make the world go round. 

The sooner that we appreciate and believe this then the sooner the conflicts and wars around the world will end.

You can make a big difference in your life and the lives of others simply by asking one question:

"What else could this mean?"

Answering this question will help you gain perspectives, feel empathy and increase awareness.

When was the last time you stopped to consider that there might be another way at looking at the situation?

Here is your challenge for the next week...

The next time you are frustrated, confused, angry or upset ask yourself this power question.

Try asking it the next time that you are stuck on a problem or arrive at a dead-end.

Ask it to yourself the next time you are in the middle of a so-called crisis.

Ask a friend this question the next time they are emotional and distraught over something.

The more that you ask yourself this question the more easily you will be able to come up with alternative ideas.

Remember, the answers that you come up with are not the most important part of the process, rather it is simply the awareness of all your alternatives.

To change anything in your life requires that you choose a new path, because you cannot change what you don't know.

A great question to ask yourself to gain awareness and perspective is: "What else could this mean?"

THE SECRET

We live in a world that is infinitely filled with all sorts, shapes and sizes of information.

Our ability to recognize, access and change information creates endless potential and possibilities for our species.

From cloning mammals to Cuban missiles we have the power to use information to both create and destroy life.

However we must always remember that information itself is neither inherently good or bad. 

For instance the Ying and Yang symbol tells us there is a little bit of good in evil, and a little bit of evil in good.

Information will always make the world go round and it will forever just be information.

Ultimately it is the person who uses the information that applies the purpose and meaning to it.

We can use information to empower and improve our lives, or we can use the same information to hinder and hamper our progress.

This choice is entirely up to us and is determined on the basis by the type and quality of questions we ask our self. 

For a specific example of how this might play into your life consider the following scenario or one like it:

You have arranged to meet your partner or good friend for dinner and you arrive on time at a restaurant. 

After about 10 minutes and the person still hasn't shown up you begin to dialogue with yourself and say “typical, she is always late, she simply has no respect for other people”. 

Stop! Wait-a-minute, immediately taking up a position like this is not going to prove very useful for your emotions is it?

Also, think about the type of evening you are setting yourself up for if and when the person does show up. It's not likely going to be a fun and friendly night will it?

Before you are temped to take your next shower in negative emotions, how about if you asked yourself "What else could this mean?"

Just by asking the question you have now given yourself some choices.

Start brainstorming from the other person's perspective and put yourself in their shoes.

Do you think they are doing this to intentionally hurt or upset you? If so, then perhaps it is time to find some new friends or even family to hang around.

If you realize that they probably didn't do it on purpose, then perhaps you could change the internal dialogue in your head to reflect something more understanding and empathetic.

For example you might think "she must really care about me because she is obviously taking the time to look her best”, or “How thoughtful of me was it to pick a restaurant that is notorious for no parking."

Coming from a perspective like this you can see how you can eliminate the build up of negative emotions and free yourself from "reacting" when they finally arrive.

With that perspective how much easier it would be avoid any arguments, make sure you put in a real effort, and try your best to salvage the rest of the night.

Think and reflect for a moment on the last time that you had an argument with a loved one. 

Try and briefly regain those feelings by seeing what you saw, hearing what you heard and feeling what you felt. 

Now take a moment and recreate the dialogue that was going on inside your head at the time. What are you saying to yourself?

Are you asking questions that are helping or are you asking questions that are likely to exacerbate the situation and lead to an argument? 

At times like this we often disappear inside our heads and look for ways to justify our feelings and support our behaviour.

Would you like to put a hugely positive spin on the situation instead by changing your state and outlook?

The alternative is to ask yourself the question "What else could this mean?" to contemplate new and more powerful perspectives.

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will help you stop worrying and start living.

THE CHALLENGE

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:
"What should I stop doing?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question at least once a day and you will reduce stress and get more done.


THE TIPS

At the end of your evening tonight, or first thing tomorrow morning, ask yourself the question:

"What should I stop doing?"

If you want to get more done it may seem a bit counterproductive to ask yourself this question, but stopping is actually an important part of the process of change.

Everything in our lives is like a door that can open new possibilities for us.

In order to fully move into any new part of life, or create a new reality for our self we must first close the door behind us that holds our old identity.

This is because in order to start one thing one must first stop doing something else, even if that something else was nothing.

For example, in order to be reading these words right now you are giving up the opportunity to do nothing.

You are also simultaneously giving up an opportunity to do something else like read a cartwheel if you were so inclined.

Some people refer to this as an 'opportunity cost', or what you have to give up when you commit to do something else.

Everything has an opportunity cost, the relationships we are in cost us other potential mates, our jobs cost us other opportunities to work somewhere else.

Subconsciously and consciously we are constantly trying to choose the best opportunities to take advantage of.

We decide what is most important in our lives by rewarding it with our time and attention.

Here is where the majority of us make a major error in judgment.

We mistakenly give up the opportunity to do what we "want/desire to do" in place of what we feel we "have to do".

Are you guilty of settling for less than you deserve in an aspect of your life? Chances are you have.

Answer 'yes' or 'no' to the following questions to see if you are spending your time wisely.

- Do you currently believe that "you have to do something", but realize that the something is draining your energy?

- Do you feel trapped by doing things the old way, pressured to perform a certain way, or have obligations that stress you out?

- Are you in a role you are no longer committed to, stuck in an unrewarding relationship, or working a jobs that is not fulfilling?

- Do you seem to find yourself "going through the motions" day in and day out?

If you have answered yes to any of the above questions then it might be time that you take something off your plate.

A great way to start the process of becoming more aware is in the consideration of the question:

"What should I stop doing?"


THE SECRET

Asking yourself "What should I stop doing?" is a great way to empower and enrich your current efforts.

Human nature is that we all want to get more done with as little time, money and energy as possible.

In life this is called 'Return on Energy' and in business it's called 'Return on Capital Expended'.

Whatever you call it at the end of the day the bottom line is that we all want to return more than we have to put out.

There is nothing wrong with wanting to be more effective and efficient in whatever you do.

After all, who willingly wants to waste their time, take longer than needed, or spend more money than necessary?

Absolutely no one. It's safe to say that 100% of the population would never consciously choose to do any of the above.

Yet how is it that most of us end up overwhelmed, frustrated or broke? What happened?

Were we that off base and delusional that we missed all signs of disaster?

Have you ever heard the old saying "It was the straw that broke the camels back?"

Its an old adage symbolizing a story upon which a camels back gets broken, seemingly all because of a single piece of straw.

Of course, we know it was the accumulation of straw over time that created those dire circumstances.

The same thing happens to us when we pile too many projects on the plate, the system is bound to breakdown.

Our when we take on projects, relationships, goals and jobs that are meaningless.

A part of the problem is that we say 'yes' to way too many things that we could be politely saying 'no thanks' too.

It doesn't help when we fail to see the pattern behind the mistakes that we repeatedly make.

If you are continually failing at something and not feeling motivated to move forward this is a sign to check your commitment.

Perhaps you are no longer interested in investing your time and energy into this, only you can tell. Be honest with yourself.

Every goal to be better, to reach higher, to obtain a new income level will require a new level of you.

You decide what experiences and memories you will fuse into the you that exists right this moment, and which aspects of your life to leave behind.

There is not enough time in our lifetime to spend it doing things that act in direct detriment to the loved ones in our lives.

Therefore it is a good practice to put only the things we truly value and the things we are really passionate about 'on our plate'.

Find areas where you feel over-stressed and discover roles where you are not 100% comfortable or committed.

Take time to record your roles and responsibilities every day. Be thorough and don't leave anything out.

Resolve to become more confident and committed to the roles you decide to keep.

Eliminate whatever roles that you can, and delegate whatever roles that you cannot eliminate.

Delegate and eliminate all the areas in your life that do not bring a good return on your capital, time or energy.

In a case where you have been attached to doing things a particular way for a long time, you may not be able to escape this separation pain free.

Unfortunately, sometimes when you finally decide to take your medicine you may have to amputate your foot in order to save your leg.

The best way to avoid a terrible situation like this is to ask yourself right now "What should I stop doing?" and then immediately begin to cut it out of your life.

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will help lead you back to a balanced lifestyle.


THE CHALLENGE

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:
"How am I spending my attention?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question as often as possible to become more aware of your thoughts, emotions and actions.


THE TIPS

Time is our most precious resource.

Time cannot be replaced, renewed. or reversed.

The wealthiest person on this planet is one who has "free" time. Time to spend on what he or she desires.

The only thing that we can use to create, build and change anything in this world is time.

The only currency that we spend our time with is attention.

The next time you are about to devote any time or energy into a situation, a great question to ask is:

"How am I spending my attention?"

The only way to solve a problem is to give it some attention.

The only way to show love to someone else is to devote your undivided attention to them.

The only way we ever do anything in this world is through spending attention.

Yet were you aware that how everybody spends their attention is different?

Attention isn't a single unit of measure, rather it is broken up into three different but related "modes".

The modes in which people spend their attention is by either thinking, feeling or doing.

We spend our attention by choosing to feel some way, think some way, or do some thing.

Throughout the day we relate to the information around us by using one of these modes, usually a combination of two.

Picture three separate "dials" sticking out of your back with the values 0 to 10 on each of them.

A persons' thinking-dial might be turned up to 10, their feeling dial to 7, and their doing dial at 3.

When given something that requires our attention, let's say a problem to solve, we always approach it using our preferred mode.

A person with their thinking and feeling dial turned up like in the example above would be inclined to sit and think about the problem.

Where as the person with their "doing-dial" turned up would be inclined to do something about the problem and think or feel later.

There is no right or wrong way to give your attention in a situation, although the most beneficial way will always stem from being aware.

The next time you are giving attention, considering options or problem-solving ask yourself: "How am I spending my attention?"

When you answer, try to be more aware of the effects of what you are thinking, feeling or doing about the situation.


THE SECRET

What is your default dial?

Do you have a tendency to think, feel or do too much?

People tend to become very dominant using one particular dial, and support that strength with a secondary dial.

When we spend our attention primarily in one or two modes, naturally the third one becomes neglected.

There is no getting around the fact that we make our decisions with two of the three dials turned up.

People will therefore always have a "strong" dial, a "support" dial, and a "weak" dial.

As time goes on this leads to an over-compensation of two dials and an under-utilization of the third.

It is important to focus your attention on all three and avoid overlooking the importance of the dial you tend to ignore.

This is important to be aware of because we are only as strong as our weakest link.

For example, a person who acts primarily without thinking will not see the bigger picture behind their actions.

A person on the other hand who thinks and feels without action, will inevitably run into problems with procrastination.

You can tell which is your strong dial and which on is weakest by observing how you tend to react to new situations and potential problems.

Do you dive-in head first and figure things out along the way? If so, you are a do'er.

If you tend to be more reserved and analytical about the situation then you are a thinker.

Do you wait and see what your gut feels like before responding? If this is you then you are a feeler.

The goal is not to change your mode of spending attention, as that will only result in frustration.

Awareness is the main goal, for only once you have become aware of something can you decide to change it.

Become aware of what dials you use, how they affect your life, and how you can benefit from using your weakest dial more often.

A great question to gain awareness of your behaviour is to ask yourself: "How am I spending my attention?"

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will discover the secret of how to create more happiness whenever, wherever no matter whatever happens.


THE CHALLENGE

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:
"Will I cherish the memories I am creating in this moment?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question and you will be able to live with less regret and more peace of mind.


THE TIPS

Most of us talk to ourselves a lot, in fact we do it day-in and day-out.

We talk ourselves into doing things and we talk ourselves out of doing things.

The problem is that we often get these two mixed up, that is, we talk our-self out of growth opportunities in order to spend our time doing things that keep us playing small.

We justify doing this for various reasons such as fear, lack and keeping within our comfort zone, etc.. but the bottom line is that giving up on dreams doesn't feel good.

One way to challenge your mental chatter, is to ask yourself the question "How can I find a way to cherish the memories I am creating in this moment?".

If you cherish the moments as you create them in the moment then they will become cherished memories in the future.

Yet how many times do we use the moment instead to think about all sorts of personal robbing and confidence stealing scenarios?

One such confidence stealer is worry.

It makes no sense to choose to spend your time in the moment worrying about some memory that has yet to happen.

Will your worrying produce a cherished memory that you will look back on in time and say "yeah, that was time well-spent?"

The answer is probably not because 99% of the time our worries never manifest, at least in the horrendous way that we fore-casted.

Another personal power robber is judgement.

Have you ever wondered where bad ideas and stupid mistakes come from?

There is no thing as a "bad" idea as long as we learn from the experience.

These are just labels in judgement, unflattering descriptions of the events that unfolded.

They all come from our imagination, merely fictions that we create.

What time teaches us is that often what we thought was the worst thing to happen to us was really a blessing in disguise.

Asking yourself "How can I find a way to cherish the memories I am creating in this moment?" will help you see the blessing faster.


THE SECRET

How often do you have to ask yourself the question "How can I find a way to cherish the memories I am creating in this moment?"

The answer is only as often as there are moments, only as consistent as you want to be empowered in those moments.

There is a moment every second, there are 60 seconds to a minute, 60 minutes to an hour, 24 hours in a day, 30 days in a month, 12 months in a year.

The standard measurement of these unique moments are what's known as experiences.

What type of experiences and unique moments did you cherish this year?

Our experiences accumulate as memories, which ultimately shape and influence our future experiences and memories.

How can you use the cherished memories of last year to influence the memories that you want to create this year.

The moments that make up the existence of our reality pass by for everyone equally at the rate of one second per second, what we do with those moments is what separates us all.

If you are 30 years old today, then since you were born you would have accumulated 3,153,600 hours worth of potential memories, how have you used them so far?

Many people feel that they are forced to accept people, places and situations, basically that they have no choice.

Thinking that you never have a choice is always an illusion because you always have a choice.

We may not like our choices and in some cases we may even be restrained from "physical" action in a situation.

However the choice that always remains is your attitude about the present moment.

You have a choice to decide if your attitude resists the moment or goes with the flow.

The biggest skill you can teach yourself is allowing the present moment to unfold in a symbiotic and loving way?

When you learn to adjust the attitude on the fly, your life will begin to become easier, lighter, less stressful.

"When the Going Gets Tough, the Tough Get Going" is a popular song originally recorded by Billy Ocean in 1985.

It is also an over-popularized cliché quoted by mentors, managers and motivators.

Basically it means that when situations in life become difficult, strong people show their strength by rising to the occasion.

The next time you are caught in a situation that you would rather not be in, before you take action ask yourself "How can I find a way to cherish the memories I am creating in this moment?" and then "get going"!

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will turn you into a lean mean achievement machine.

THE CHALLENGE

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:

"Am I happy with what I have procrastinated?"

THE PROMISE

Asking this question at the beginning and end of your day and you will begin to organize your life around your highest priorities.


THE TIPS

Do you procrastinate? Do you feel that procrastination is a bad thing to do?

Is procrastination a dirty little secret that you keep from your high performing peers and partners?

How do you feel about procrastination? Is this something that you have been struggling with for a while?

What if you were told that procrastination was not only needed, but should be welcomed and encouraged?

The reality is that procrastination happens in life just like change happens.

Avoiding change is not natural, and doing so will keep you playing small, struggling to adapt and coping poorly with life.

Just like we must learn to deal with change, if we want to be successful under any standard we must first learn how to properly deal with procrastination.

Procrastination is something that people use as a tool to succeed, and it is also something that people who struggle with use to beat them self up.

How do you view and use procrastination?

Do you feel that procrastination is a bad thing to do? If so, consider this...

There are simply not enough hours in each day to accomplish all the tasks that we need done.

This is not a bad thing, think about this for a minute and realize if you only had one task to complete all year it would be pretty boring and uneventful.

Generally speaking each of us has more packed onto our plate than we could ever hope to handle in one sitting.

As a result we choose to procrastinate something when we decide to do another thing.

The root of the word "decide" is from the Latin word "decidere", which translates "to cut off."

When we accept to act upon a particular course of action, we have decided to cut off the alternative, even if just temporarily.

Human beings can only focus their energy and attention on one thing at a time, especially if they expect that something to grow.

Procrastination is not only needed but it is a valuable tool that allows us to direct and discriminate our decisions.

The true problem with procrastination is when we procrastinate the critical and important stuff.

For example if we want our career in life to take off, we tend to focus on it above anything else, including our families.

Sometimes we have to temporarily sacrifice in order to produce the desired long-term benefits, like being able to retire early and spend time with your loved ones.

Asking yourself "Am I happy with what I have procrastinated?" will help ensure that you are committing your time and attention in the right areas.


THE SECRET

Ask yourself "Am I happy with what I have procrastinated?" at the end of your day to get a snapshot of your daily success.

Ask yourself "What is the benefit of my procrastination" is a great follow up question to gauge your intentions.

Do you feel like you were able to move forward directly due to the actions that you have decided to take today?

If you fell short of your goal and spent time on the usual attention eaters, relax and try not to be too hard on yourself.

If you do not feel good about what you have procrastinated write it down and record your thoughts.

Keep track of your priorities as well as how you spent your time.

Time management is really how well you can manage the priorities of your life.

The fact is that everyone would be living the life of their dreams if fear wasn't such a cunning adversary.

Fear works in mysterious ways that cause people to focus on perceived problems and potential barriers.

This become a big problem because we constantly attract into our lives that upon which we focus on.

So by focusing on potential problems they soon turn into actual problems that hold us back from our goals.

The best way to combat procrastination is by taking the time necessary to figure out two important things:

1. First you need to really figure out what you really, really, really, want.

What do you want to manifest in your life, what type of people do you truly want to connect with, what type of experiences would you most enjoy?

The big tip here is to avoid forming desires and dreams that fall into the "must-be-nice" or "wishful thinking".

2. Second, once you have figured out what you really, really, really want, your next task is to figure out why.

Why do you want what you really, really, really want? What would having or accomplishing your dream or desire give you?

The big tip here is to keep asking yourself the question "why" and drilling deeper until you have uncovered a value.

A value is something that is core to your being, an expression of the energy and life that is within you.

Imagine how allowing the expression of your core being would feel like for you.

When you align yourself up with your values, you can more easily express yourself.

Asking yourself "why" you want something connects you with your thoughts aund feelings, the automatic guidance system that will reveal the answers.

When you know what you want to express in yourself and why you want to express it, the answer of "how" to express it will also show up.

This is important because many people try and figure out "how" they will accomplish their dreams first, rather than after figuring out what those dreams will truly provide them.

Obstacles arrive when people try and figure out how to get something rather than determine why they want it.

When we don't have the why built behind our behaviour, the logic of how and fear of change tend to trump our ability to move forward.

The bigger the why, the smaller the how.

When you take the time to figure out what you want and why you truly want it, you will quickly witness yourself doing everything and anything to make it possible.

Ask yourself "Am I happy with what I have procrastinated?" to see how on track your time management skills are.

Balancing your procrastination away from the urgent and towards the critically important is the key to life management.

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will give you a whole new outlook on life.


THE CHALLENGE

Your Mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:
"How do I know the story that I am telling myself is real?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question whenever you are talking to yourself this week and the promise is you will open up your mind and help put a positive spin on the perspective of your life.


THE TIPS

Since you woke up today what "stories" about yourself and your life have you bought into?

Stories are represented by the self-talk, thoughts, ideas, beliefs, assumptions, attitudes and paradigms that you filter your world through.

Pay attention to how the story makes you feel.

Does the story make you stronger or seem to prolong your success longer?

What's important is whether or not the story was "supportive" or "non-supportive" towards the fulfillment of your higher self, or higher purpose

Struggling repeatedly, unable to break-through or have been making the same mistake over and over are all symptoms of a non-supportive story.

Whenever you are consciously aware of your story ask yourself "how do I know the story that I am telling myself is real?"

This week let's focus on the seemingly "negative" stories that we often tell our self.

Stories something along the lines of "ugh, I'm so tired... I don't sleep well the night before big presentations and now today work is going to be a nightmare"

Or your story could sound like "today's test at school is going to be hard because I'm not good at math"

Your self-talk could say something such as "I will never lose those extra pounds"

These are just some of the stories that people tell themselves on a daily basis, however the variations and possibilities are "unfortunately" endless.

It's unfortunate because there are NO species on Earth besides humans that tell stories to them self.

In fact humans are the only species that mentally second guesses its' own natural intuitive abilities and tells stories to itself.

The only thing worse than telling stories to yourself is believing the stories you are telling.

The next time you find yourself in the middle of a story, ask yourself the question "How do I know the story that I am telling myself is real?"

Let's play out the application of this mindset using the above example "ugh, I'm so tired... I don't sleep well the night before big presentations and now today work is going to be a nightmare"

Upon realizing that you have caught yourself in the middle of this non-supportive story you can now instead ask yourself "how do I know the story that I am telling myself is real?" and begin brainstorming all the possibilities that you could be wrong.

Using the example of the being tired, you would try and recall previous examples where you were able to perform even though your energy and focus were not optimal.

Or you could ponder how without being psychic you could know "for certain" that the presentation would be a nightmare if you haven't yet experienced it?

Are you taking into consideration that everyone is given an opportunity to learn and grow from their experiences?

Have you considered that even if you were an absolute and complete failure prior to today, you can use all your experiences of failure to create new and better ways to get what you need done.

For example you think back and remember that you always struggle with the opening of your presentation, but using this information positively by taking time before the presentation to remember the first few lines. You may not remember them all or improve your presentation 100%, but at least now you have a history of conscious improvement that you can be proud of.

It is up to you to use your previous challenges to bring awareness to the areas in life that you need to prepare more.



THE SECRET

So you might be wondering how exactly do you know whether or not to believe a story?

The best advice is adopted from Henry Ford quotes who said "whether you believe you can or you can not, you are right".

This means that whatever story you are telling yourself is the only one you are going to believe and no one else will be able to convince you otherwise until you've first considered it yourself.

Since the process of story telling is self-serving you may as well try and consciously ensure that the story serves the self.

Make sure that the story frames the situation in the best way possible and puts you in a position to move forward.

A great question to follow-up the question of "How do I know the story that I am telling myself is real?" is asking yourself:

"What if the whole story or parts of it turned out to be fabricated?"

Believe it or not the likelihood of you turning up new information that out dates your old information is quite high.

This is because the reality we experience is only as good as the senses we perceive it with.

Many technologies were invented because we can not capture the entirety of reality with just our natural senses.

For example things like infrared, ultra-violet, microwaves, infra-sound are all things that exist but are not detectable by our senses.

We cannot see in infrared, spot ultra-violet light or hear infra-sound normally but they all can become a part of our reality with the right equipment.

With technology we can now see in the dark with night vision goggles and apply sun block to screen out invisible but harmful UV rays.

Yet these are things that in which were not possible only a few short years ago.

So imagine if we always thought it would never be possible to see in the dark simply based on the history of not being able to see in the dark before?

The discovery of floatation and buoyancy was not derived by pondering the science of sinking.

You only limit future experiences by believing the stories of your past because the feelings of these stories keep you from your higher self which is always found in the present moment.

The present moment brings with it choice. Choice to choose what you story you will voluntarily believe.

The more lucid and liquid like your beliefs around the stories that you tell yourself the more your attitude will be able to adapt to accommodate the growth and changes in your life.

Develop the conscious awareness within yourself to be like water, fluid and flexible in your thinking and learn to go with the flow and change states as needed.

One of your greatest goals in life is to consciously decide how to apply previous experiences in any given situation to achieve the best results.

The best results in any given situation are those that move you towards your goal in the quickest and easiest way.

Be patient with yourself at all times and be certain to reward yourself whenever you uncover any unsupportive belief systems and stories.

You can develop a fluid a flexible way of thinking by asking yourself "How do I know the story that I am telling myself is real?" and following that answer up with "What if the whole story or parts of it turned out to be fabricated?"

Everyday you have the gift and freedom of complete control of writing and re-writing your story to suit your lifestyle and life aspirations.

It is not your role to "read" or live the story of your life but rather it is your responsibility to write or create the story of your life.

You are the storyteller of your destiny so make sure that write your life as a storybook fairytale!

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will make you look at yourself in a new light.


THE CHALLENGE

The Mindset challenge I am proposing this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:

"What would the new me do?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question during every personal challenge this week and the promise is that you will laugh more, love yourself more and learn to relax more.


THE TIPS

If you are quitting a habit or building a new lifestyle ask yourself "What would the new me do?" in order to see yourself in a new light.

Seeing yourself in a new light is important, especially if you are interested in personal development and self-improvement because you are most likely self-critical.

This means that you are constantly critiquing your own actions, behaviours and results against a standard that you've set for yourself.
Whether you are conscious of it or not, you have a certain standard of performance that you measure yourself against in all areas of your life.

For example your relationships, health, finances and career are only some of the areas that you hold yourself accountable in an effort to improve yourself.

We try to improve our self because deep down we are all good people that just want to be loved, to love and to contribute to something better.

Yet for a however many possible reasons our lofty goal doesn't get realized and we somehow end up feeling scared, alone and afraid to live.

Somehow we are not able to find the self-discipline, the strategy for success or the willpower to stay the course.

But what exactly happens to our best intentions that have us ending up in self-sabotage?

What happens is we tend to think about all the mistakes, the failures the missed opportunities of our past, present and future.

We tend to think about things that don't empower us, and think about our self in ways that don't empower us.

Even in brand new situations we tend to associate our old negative sense of self.

For example someone might not think they are good at talking to people, based on years of their old negative sense of self reminding them of all their failures.

No matter how many new people this person meets they essentially pre-determine their future by imagining a negative outcome.

Even in a situation where the feedback was positive this person would tend to dis-associate any feedback that doesn't resonate with this negative self-vision.

This likely applies to many situations in your life, and if this is you, today's question will help you build a new database of positive experiences.

All you have to do is look for the good in everyone and in every situation and you will attract more of that to you.
For every situation you're in this week (including those that are frustrating or seem completely negative!) write down what is good about that situation.

When you do this notice how it immediately changes your perspective and opens up your mind to new possibilities.

Today is a new day, and instead of allowing yourself to think negatively think about your higher self, your ideal self.

Once you have a picture of the ideal person you want to be then ask yourself "What would the new me do?"
If you are quitting smoking, be present with the craving to smoke and ask yourself, with this craving... "what would the new me do?" and then make a decision from the person who has X amount of days smoke-free.

You are powerful and you can change any habit you want to, instantly if you have a strong enough desire.

It is in the moment and from each moment-to-moment that our destinies are shaped by our choices.
Whenever you encounter a situation that you are emotional about or find yourself reacting to, try and think about your ideal vision of yourself.

Picture you in all your future glory and greatness and from that state ask yourself "What would this new me do?"


THE SECRET

Can you picture yourself in the future, one month from now, one year from now, five years from now?

How about when you are picturing yourself in the past, yesterday, last year, when you were young?

Are you able to appreciate and accept all of your memories?

Are you passionately creating new and exciting memories?

When you picture your past or future self are you receiving attention, affection and adoration?

Or do you tend to criticize yourself, beat yourself up, or think that you should have done something different, if only...

Regardless of whether it is your past you are thinking about or your future you must learn to think about it positively.

The best question to get yourself in this new mindset is: "What would the new me do?" and then think from that state.

One of your greatest challenges in life is to be able to uncover the wisdom in every situation and apply the new found lesson to help you grow.

Where we go in the mind we follow in the body and where we cannot go in the mind we rarely go in reality.

For example, if you cannot picture yourself in a relationship with a certain person you probably wouldn't be in one with them right?

Yet on the opposite spectrum of visualization you got dressed this morning didn't you?

Well chances are you pictured the outfit you are wearing at least once before physically dressing yourself in it.

The visualization of your future self in a positive light is critical and important.

When we picture a happy, joyful and playful future we put ourselves in a positive state.

Then, by virtue of The Law of Attraction, we attract the same situations as we were visualizing our future.

Remember you are a masterpiece in the making and your future is constantly unfolding something new... if you only allow it!

Apply these ideas immediately to your thought process this week and instantly watch your new found future unfold!

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will revolutionize the way you see, act and feel about your day.


THE CHALLENGE

Your mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself: "Am I feeling joy?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question and you will uncover the roots of the problems that have been plaguing you and discover answers that will lead you to a life of pure bliss.


THE TIPS

Whenever you arrive at a fork in the road a great question to ask yourself is "Am I feeling joy?"

A fork in the road could be represented in your life as: making a decision, taking a course of action or choosing to be, think or feel a certain way.

Whenever you notice that you are at a crossroads ask yourself "Am I feeling joy" and then listen carefully for an answer.

Excitement and nervous energy are both excellent clues that you are following your joy.

If you aren't feeling enthusiastic, excited or even nervous about something than chances are likely that you won't put yourself fully into whatever situation demands your attention.

It is important to put your full attention into a situation because where your attention goes your energy flows and the results will show.

You reap what you sow and you get out what you put in, so if you were not happy enough to fully put yourself into a situation than why does it make sense that you would expect to be happy when you are finished?

If you put in an orange, a banana and an apple into a blender you wouldn't expect a chocolate milkshake would you?

It doesn't make sense to be upset at the fruit for not turning into chocolate right? Yet that is what we do when we go into a situation grumpy and ungrateful and expect it somehow to be magically transformed into an adventure of pure bliss.

Some people might feel overwhelmed at the realization that the same emotions that you put into a situation are primarily responsible for the type of energy and feeling you will get out of the situation. If this is you then you may take a while longer to deal with your new found responsibility.

But you don't need to make things unnecessarily overcomplicated for yourself by trying to look for, identify and manage a dozen emotions. The feeling you are looking for can be answered in one question: "Am I feeling joy?"

If you are not feeling joy in this moment then there is not a problem with the circumstance because circumstances are neutral, rather there is likely a problem with your internal joy meter.

A circumstance like someone breaking their arm seems to be a 'bad' scenario if you are the one who broke it, however, if you are the Doctor's office that is employed when circumstances like this happen, then the event would be viewed as 'good'.

Since this is the same event it cannot have both mutually exclusive feelings attached, unless the emotions that are generated are only subjective, meaning that only the person experiencing, not the actual experience, produces the feeling.

How can you change your beliefs about a situation in a way that allows you to be happy?

A master of their emotions allows them self to embrace every situation and find a way to accommodate the change or circumstance rather than resist the current.

Accepting and allowing joy in any situation is a sign that someone didn't get caught up in the current of emotion and is capable of going with the flow.


THE SECRET

Your joy meter is the automatic feeling of exhilaration when you are doing something you love.

Other questions to stimulate your thinking could be "How could I be feeling joy in this moment?" and additionally, "In what ways could I be feeling more joy?"

If you aren't quite sure how to tell if you are doing something that you love you can always learn to follow your fear or chase your goosebumps.

The goosebumps that can stand up on your skin even when you are merely discussing a idea that has your full attention is a great indicator that you are following a passion.

Alternatively, while most people associate fear as a bad thing, it can also be used in a more positive and productive way by indicating your feelings about a situation.

Just because you are nervous and anxious doesn't mean that you will fail and are not meant to succeed. Fear is just a way of telling us that the circumstances in front of us are important.

Successful people feel the same fear that unsuccessful people do, sometimes even stronger and yet they still manage to go through with it anyway.

When you are enjoying yourself you are living fully and completely in the moment, your face is lit up with a jubilant smile and, you are likely to lose track of time. If more people lived this lifestyle we would not have the mental pollution and poverty that plagues us today.

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will help you appreciate yourself more, attract healthier relationships and be an overall better person.


THE CHALLENGE

Your mindset challenge this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself: "Would you date yourself?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question and you will gain a more accurate reflection of yourself and a better understanding of your fears.

Next time that you have a few minutes alone to think ask yourself "Would I date myself?"

You might be wondering the relevance of this question if you already have a significant other but, regardless of relationship status, a careful consideration of this question can provide insight into what you contribute to your relationships.

If you answered "Yes" that you would date yourself, then the next question is why? What kind of reasons came to mind that make yourself a worthy prize?

When taking a personal inventory the answers you learn might even surprise you!

Could you fall in love with yourself? What traits of yours are you most proud? Are you a constant source of support? What about your communication skills? Are you always finding good things to comment about your significant other?

Do you find yourself thinking "I wish my partner..." or "If only my significant other...."? If so, these might be the best signs that you need to look in the mirror first.

"What would you change/improve if you were dating yourself?" "What specifically do you love about yourself?" If you aren't excited about dating yourself then how do you expect anybody else to be?

It is important to note that your partner or significant other must also agree with your self-assessment. If you think you are the worlds best communicator and your partner thinks otherwise, then any adjustments made would be based on a false assessment and thus likely prove counter-productive.

A relationship should for the most part be 50/50 in terms of contribution. What strengths do you contribute? Do they equal your share of the 50%? How do the strengths that you identified help make the relationship strong in your partners opinion?

Use what you've learned from this exercise to build on your strengths and identify any areas where you might have the opportunity to provide more value in your relationships.


THE SECRET

Looking at yourself through an open and honest mirror requires courage and willingness to see yourself objectively in a new way.

It is the mark of a true leader to be able to acknowledge their shortcomings and build upon the strengths that they recognized for.

If for some reason you cannot uncover any areas of improvement for yourself then look at the areas of resistance, friction and conflict in your relationships.

In what situations do you feel most uncomfortable? Pay attention to your discomfort because there is always a hidden gift within.

Your discomfort often shows you the areas in your life that you should review and revise any belief systems that no longer continue to serve you.

"What do you need to improve within yourself so that you become a more effective attractor of your desired results?"

Put yourself in the other persons shoes, see things from their perspective and appreciate the gift of awareness as an opportunity to be the change you want to see in the world.

Monday Motivating Mindset

THE HYPE

This weeks Motivating Mindset will help you live with more fun, appreciation and a better overall attitude.


THE CHALLENGE

The Mindset challenge I am proposing this week is getting in the habit of asking yourself:

"What three people have contributed most to my success?"


THE PROMISE

Ask yourself this question and you will uncover important life lessons, discover new opportunities and attract exciting people into your life.


THE TIPS

Before you begin your day today ask "What three people have contributed most to my success?"

The follow up questions could be "What specifically did they teach me?" and "How as their teaching benefited my life?"

Think back to your teachers, your parents and your family. What about the people you have worked with, the new friends you've met, old friends you've reconnected with? How about a spouse or a loved one? A work mentor, manager or colleague?

A good test to determine whether the person you are thinking of is in your top three, ask yourself "Where would I be today if I did not learn ______ from this person?"

If you would still be essentially the same person, then perhaps search for someone who possibly has made a more meaningful or significant contribution to your life.

If you would not be where you are today or who you are today as a direct result of dealing with this person then there's a good chance that they rank in your top three.

Try and come up with at least three people, even if this exercise takes a couple days to really think through. You may however have many more than three top teachers, in fact, this is going to be more likely as you get more and more successful.

People who are a success become successful by walking on the shoulders of giants. What that means is that successful people, before becoming a success realize the importance of standing on the shoulders of the people that they respect and admire.

In fact, here is a brief list of famous mentor - mentee relationships that you might recognize:

Huey Lewis mentor to Bruce Hornsby
Don Henley mentor to Sheryl Crow
Mel Gibson mentor to late Heath Ledger
Maya Angelou mentor to Oprah Winfrey
Stevie Wonder mentor to India.Arie
Earl Nightingale mentor to Bob Proctor
Socrates mentor to Plato
Mark O'Meara and Butch Harmon mentors to Tiger Woods

Did a couple of those names you just read surprise you? Yes, mentoring has been around since before Socrates and Plato and some of the most successful people in the world have mentors.

Why does the greatest golf player in the history of the sport require mentors and coaches?

The world's most successful people have long realized that the more people that they learn from the better and faster that they will grow. It is impossible to make all the mistakes you need to learn all in your own lifetime so leverage the lessons of others to skyrocket your success.


THE SECRET

There is no "right" or "wrong" answer because the person and premise is completely decided upon by you. If you don't feel someone is worthy of mention, then simply don't mention them.

The truth is that we ALL have something to learn from one another. Every person that comes into your life, whether yesterday, today or tomorrow has something to teach you.

Try and get in the habit of finding a "Sensei of the Day". Sensei is a Japanese word meaning teacher, so Sensei of the day is simply a Teacher of the Day.

Every relationship that we hold with our self reflects an agreement about the nature of the relationship that we have made with ourselves.

Learn from the people that are in your life whether you perceive them to be a positive or negative influence.

If you feel that they are a positive influence try to identify one or two areas that they do well in and implement a similar strategy into your life. Don't be afraid to approach someone that you admire and ask them for some quick words of advice. All successful people had help along the way, the more you ask for it the more you can receive.

If you feel that they are a negative influence try to identify one or two reasons why you think they are behaving or acting out in this manner and gain understanding as to what specifically bothers you about their actions. This is a contrast to what you do like, but sometimes we need to know what we don't like in order to help determine what we do. The next time you find someone demonstrating a behaviour you don't like, silently thank them for the gift of awareness of contrast and endeavour never to act like them.

When you become thankful for the people that are in your life you naturally start to attract more of them to be thankful for. Appreciate the lessons of life and the teachers they come from and you will be ripe and ready for relationship riches!